Phew, now that’s done it I’ll admit I’m going through the menopause or perimenopause, I’m not sure which?

The one thing I’m can be certain of is my appalling memory. I used to be able to remember the names of hundreds of students and their families, but I started to lose the plot in my early 40’s. Looking back now that was one of the early signs that I was heading towards an early menopause.

I remember mentioning it at the time to my mum and being told, don’t be silly you’re far too young for that. Women in our family didn’t hit menopause until well into their 50’s, mum was still hoping for a grandchild and to be honest I was still hoping it might happen. Also I didn’t know anyone else who had this happen to them.

It wasn’t to be. but it turned out that the early menopause or peri-menopause definitely was. I started to put on weight in strange ways, carrying it in places I never had before but so many friends were putting on the Dubai stone or two. I had the sweats, but couldn’t be totally sure about that, I was in the Middle East going between ridiculously hot and freezing cold air-con, everyone had the sweats! I had little dark hairs appear now and then that needed plucking, but all the women I knew got those and you should have seen the Arab girls!

What worries me most though is the memory thing. It tends to be short term memory and I never know when it will strike. I’m not working so am more conscious about keeping my memory active in some way. I have lists. Lots of lists.

kitchen calendar

kitchen calendar

kitchen blackboard

kitchen blackboard

There’s a blackboard on the kitchen cupboard and a calendar on the side of the shelving unit, a notebook on the side table and of course an electronic calendar linked to all my devices and all my social network stuff. Plus all those pieces of paper that get stuffed in handbags.

All of the lists still don’t stop me from slipping up occasionally. Yesterday I was catching up with pod-casts and listening to the latest from Two Fat Expats when I scrolled through the others I’d yet to download, that’s when I saw it in black and white. “Expat Guilt“. I was distraught had I really copied from them? My post that morning had already been published “Expat guilt – on Mother’s Day” I know the horrors of plagiarism I used to teach students all about it. So I started to listen to the pod-cast and realised I hadn’t heard it yet so the content wasn’t an issue just the title. I quickly sent them a message of apology.

My evening primrose oil on a shelf in the bathroom

My evening primrose oil on a shelf in the bathroom

This fog that is supposed to be my memory will, I’ve been assured by friends, improved once I come through the other side. The only problem is I don’t know when that will be. At my last gynaecologist check up the doctor said I wasn’t menopausal yet, so perimenopause it is. Or it really was too hot and I’m just going crazy, which I’m sure is what my husband thinks at times! But the mental fog needs to be addressed. Writing requires a brain that’s sharp and switched on not foggy and useless. I did start taking evening primrose oil which did seem to work, with fractured legs and other stuff I’ve forgotten to take it for over a month now!

From today I’m back on the wagon taking my evening primrose oil to help my memory. Hopefully there will be no more copying other people’s titles! Now what’s the best way of remembering to take it?

Sometimes it feels like no-one else has these problems, some friends have commented that the menopause came and went unnoticed. I haven’t found many bloggers who discuss it either, I wonder why? Is it such a taboo subject within our society? There are enough medical sites that will give you lists of symptoms and pharmaceutical companies who will sell you hormone replacement therapies. That’s something I’ll research further, now where did I put that thingy whatsit? 🙂


Are you going through the menopause? Do you have problems with your memory now? What ways have you found to cope with this change in life? If you found this post interesting please comment below and share. Thank you

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